doing

celebrate the last day of 2006!

but time is just time. without beginning and never ending, regardless of our human designation for days or years. everyday is just like the new year. i've finally found the peace i wanted to find. it's a beautiful day, and the sun looks like a winter sun, just that it's hanging very high in the sky.

when you ask a person who was blind from birth to picture a line, does he really picture a line as we know it?

bills

revised organic chemistry today with jia en, beejuan and siuchu!

alkanes

1. free radical substitution mechanism: initiation, propagation, termination
2. optical isomerism

alkenes

1. production by dehydration of primary/secondary alcohols
2. electrophilic addition with hydrogen halides (in aqueous medium and inert solvent)
3. markovnikov's rule
4. zaitsev's rule
5. oxidative cleavage with hot acidified potassium permanganate
6. formation of diol with cold alkaline potassium permanganate
7. formation of alcohol with cold concentrated sulphuric acid, followed by warm water
8. geometric isomerism

arenes

1. electrophilic substitution mechanism: generation of electrophile, electrophilic attack, loss of proton
2. halogen carriers
3. activating or deactivating groups
4. 2,4- or 3,5- directing groups
5. methylbenzene: nitration
6. oxidation of alkylbenzene to benzoic acid

halogenoalkanes

1. production from alcohols by phosphorous penta-/trichloride or thionyl chloride in pyridine
2. nucleophilic substitution mechanisms 1 and 2
3. nucleophilic substitution with hydroxide ions (in aqueous medium) to form alcohols
5. nucleophilic substitution with ammonia in ethanol (heated in sealed tube) to form amines/polyalklyamines/polyalkylammonium salts
6. nucleophilic substitution with cyanide ions to form nitriles
7. nucleophilic substitution with alkoxide ions to form alkoxy compounds (williamson synthesis)
8. dehydrohalogenation using hydroxide in alcoholic medium to form alkenes

halogenoarenes

1. partial double bond character
2. 2,4-directing halogen atoms

hydroxy compounds

1. formation of halogenoalkanes using phosphorous penta-/trichloride or thionyl chloride in pyridine
2. oxidation to aldehydes, ketones and carboxylic acids
3. iodoform test for methyl alcohols
4. acidity comparison with alcohol, water and phenol
5. electrophilic susbtitution reactions of phenol with bromine (aqueous medium or inert solvent), and nitric acid (concentrated or dilute)
6. test for phenol using neutral iron(III) chloride

carbonyl compounds

1. reduction to form alcohols
2. oxidation of aldehydes to carboxylic acids
3. 2,4-dinitrophenylhydrazine test for carbonyl compounds
3. iodoform test for methyl carbonyl compounds
4. fehling's test for aliphatic aldehydes
5. tollens' test for aromatic aldehydes
6. nucleophilic addition with hydrogen cyanide to form cyanohydrins

carboxylic acids

1. reduction to form alcohols
2. stability of carboxylate anion
3. sodium carbonate test for carboxylic acids

carboxylic acid derivatives

1. acyl chloride formation from carboxylic acids using phosphorous penta-/trichloride or thionyl chloride in pyridine
2. immediate hydrolysis of acyl chlorides on contact with water
3. ester formation from acyl chlorides and alcohols
4. hydrolysis of esters in acidic or alkaline medium
5. amide formation from acyl chlorides and amines
6. reduction of amides to form amines
7. hydrolysis of amides in acidic or alkaline medium

amines

1. basicity
2. litmus test for amines
3. formation from reduction of amides
4. formation from reduction of nitriles
5. reaction with acyl chlorides to form amides

amides

1. stereochemistry of amides due to hybridisation of nitrogen
2. reduction of amides to amines
3. formation from acyl chlorides and amines

amino acids

1. zwitterion formation
2. pH-buffering properties
3. solubility in aqueous/acidic/alkaline affected by zwitterion state
4. r-group interactions: hydrogen bonding, hydrophobic interactions, ionic interactions, disulphide bridges

proteins

1. primary structure: sequence of amino acids
2. secondary structure: local conformation of polypeptide chain
3. alpha-helix
4. anti-/parallel beta-pleated sheet
5. hydrogen bonding between amide bonds
6. tertiary structure: overall conformation of polypeptide chain
7. hydrophobic interactions
8. ionic interactions
9. disulphide bridges
10. quarternary structure: interactions of polypeptide chains to form globular protein
11. enzymes

oh yes i'm so going to keep my A for chemistry! i swept the floor at night.

as good as new

sometimes, it's just so hard to remember someone/something. it's there, you now it, but you just can't grasp it clearly. it's as though you've been concussed and you've lost that memory. so bit by bit, using whatever help you can get, you try to piece it back together. some parts become clear, but others remain hazy.

i've been engaging in a little memory-collection of my own. i was surprised that this morning i remembered quite clearly the things i wanted to recall. except one part that was still hazy. but once in a while that memory goes away. it's like trying to catch fire, until it burns you up.

at this point i am reminded of the carpenters song. all my best memories come back clearly to me, some can even make me cry.

unblock.

joel was online again today. then i realised i didn't feel like talking anyway.

panda

it's been a beautiful day today. no rain/pain. but, i've been unproductive today. didn't manage to do much housework. instead, i've just been sitting in front of the computer hoping that it wouldn't die on me.

i waited super long at mos burger for my order.

seduce

this... stuff? oh... ok, i see. you think this has nothing to do with you. you go to your closet and you select out, i don't know, that lumpy blue sweater, for instance, because you're trying to tell the world that you take yourself too seriously to care about what you put on your back. but what you don't know is that that sweater is not just blue. it's not turquoise; it's not lapis; it's actually cerulean. you're also blindly unaware of the fact that in 2002, oscar de la renta did a collection of cerulean gowns. and then i think it was yves st laurent, wasn't it, who showed cerulean military jackets? i think we need a jacket here. and then cerulean quickly showed up in the collections of eight different designers. then it filtered down through the department stores and then trickled on down into some tragic casual corner where you, no doubt, fished it out of some clearance bin. however, that blue represents millions of dollars and countless jobs and so it's comical how you think that you've made a choice that exempts you from the fashion industry when, in fact, you're wearing a sweater that was selected for you by the people in this room. from a pile of stuff.

miranda priestly

i am quite sure the colour above is pink.

next stop:

i've been waking up real late these few days, but i don't feel guilty. it's been raining everyday too. i really want to be back in hong kong. went to the airport to pick seibu up with clara and beejuan. clara went to cut her hair =( and the rest of us brought seibu's things to the hostel.

the train ride to newton was terrible because some people were just so uninitiative when it came to giving way. seibu took us on a walk in the bloody rain to get to sixth avenue grr. my pants got wet so i can't wear them again =(

dinner was at breko at holland village. omg i had the chicken cordon bleu and there was so much cheese. the lighting was dim, so the food didn't look too fatty. after dinner we were just thinking about what school would be like next year. and then we kept laughing at the prospect of taking common test 1, common test 2, prelims and 'A' levels. one in each term!

there was a woman on the train this morning who asked me how to spell 'gift'. she was trying to write an sms. i would very much like to start talking again. i feel as though i'm incapable of liking someone, as though i don't really know how to like someone.

charge

i did my laundry, carried out my errands, and completed my chores. then i thought, what the heck, i'll just go for the class outing. turns out, i was the first to reach cineleisure even though i went into heeren initially. and, there were only six people at the movie. we watched charlotte's web, which was so magical and touching *sobs* but i still don't like spiders.

yihui joined us for dinner. oh but it was crowded everywhere and amanda was going to cry! so we went to pepper lunch. and then when beejuan who pangsehed her ex-class left for her ex-class dinner, we went to coffee bean to sit. we played 终极秘码 with milk. and then clara played 'black jack' with james. haha clara lost like crap, and after that amanda played, but she never won even after a long long time.

it's been nice tonight. i don't understand how an earthquake in taiwan could disrupt my internet service here. but boonping says the earthquake punctured an undersea internet cable. i don't really want school to start. i just want to be back at mongkok.

cross

it's the tsunami day today. the weather's not very friendly - it's just been raining and raining. but things aren't being washed away. perhaps, some stains are that indelible. oh, and taiwan just had an earthquake.

i really want to go back to bank centre mall in mongkok. and then i just realised that my christmas had been really uneventful. no christmas dinner; no christmas log cake; no christmas presents; no christmas lights; no christmas.

santa baby

this doesn't feel like christmas. i don't know why, it's just too quiet. it's gloomy, and it's bleak. maybe after spending a week in mongkok, you'll find that sometimes singapore is really just a little quiet.

constant

i saw mr gwee at tiong bahru plaza today. it's been raining non-stop. i've received two christmas cards this year from boonping and weicheng. boonping's card is so pretty; it's desperate housewives! i still feel some sadness.

merry christmas in advance.

seibu

back from hong kong!

it had been such a long time since i woke up early at 6am. but i had a plane to catch! and so i was back on the train at early 6am, watching people around me sleep. it was a beautiful morning.

yes, on the plane to hong kong weiyang and i were behaving like white trash. then he was asking the flight attendant for wine, kid's toys and cards (of which he received none). it was very cloudy in the sky, and flying through the clouds was cute. like bouncing on them.

the flight was so short =( i was hoping for some night flight so that i could see stars. oh i had the window seat, so i got to see all the hong kong mountains when we were about to land. and i did see a big buddha statue from far away on top of a mountain! the hong kong airport looked quite dull =( and the water was freezing.

yay hong kong was cold like finland, but the air was bad =( smokers everywhere grr. in some ways, hong kong looked like singapore, especially the high-rise buildings. but the way the buildings were arranged just made them so hong kong. groups of buildings just cluster on the side of the hills, and looking so out of place when compared to one another. it was as though the developers couldn't agree on a single building design.

the hotel was at prince edward, and it was not bad for a three-star! the area bustles with many people at night, and everyone's walking pace is so fast and unforgiving. once in a while we walked past the smelly beancurd stalls, but i didn't try them haha.

女人街 was where i bought some cheapo bag for S$20. the shopkeeper was nice, but others were scary. some can start grabbing your hand to make you stay, while others can start scolding you for trying too hard to bargain.

you wouldn't believe that weiyang chose one bed over another in the hotel room because the first one had a mirror in front of it, and he refused to sleep with the television switched off. but i still turned it off after he fell asleep.

there was a 'jimmy cake shop' near the hotel, and it had really cheap egg tarts. like six tarts for S$2! imagine paying 80 cents for one in singapore =( and, the service was nice too. we went to siuchu's house on the second day. her mum made lots of dim sum for us, and there was salmon chee cheong fun! siuchu's 龟龟 was so big, and it was fun to watch it eat bananas haha. it simply refused to move any part of its body except its head when it eats! and it tried to attack beejuan with pee!

the cloud cover in hong kong is weird. on the first day there were a lot, but subsequently we kept getting clear blue skies. we went to a fishing village and it was so stinky =( oh i saw squids with glowing bellies! and we were walking on a beach strewn with broken glass. so scary!

sometimes, when you walk in a big city full of people, you just want to hold someone's hand. oh we went to 许留山 under weiyang's recommendation for mango pudding. hmm i think it was very nice, but not so fantastic that i would want to have it everyday haha. we went shopping at bank centre mall at mongkok. and i bought a pair of cute converse shoes for myself =)

day three was at central. now it really looked like hong kong. prince edward had quite a few old buildings, but central really looked urban, and like the way hong kong is portrayed on television. we were at some garden, and we walked through the aviary (without jia en) and we saw big white pelicans! there was a shop named 'seibu', and it sounded so dumb that weiyang used it to call siuchu.

we also visited repulse bay and stanley bay. the sand on repluse bay was so much more finer than at fort siloso beach haha. we walked around the stanley area and it looked quite like a european town. and, there was a stupid/crazy boy who kept plucking leaves from a shrub to throw at us when we walked past him. *slap* we saw many wedding couples on the third day. when weiyang saw a bride and commented that she was pretty, the bridegroom smiled at him. oh i dreamt that weiyang died, and he became two pieces of paper that i brought to a 7-eleven store to revive.

we went to lantau island on day four! oh the cable car ride was so fun and cold! we were travelling so high above the ground, and below us there were quite a few people climbing the mountain! haha we waved at some of them from the cable car, and they waved back!

and yiyan arrived on day four! we were all at times square, but everything there was too expensive for shopping. i bought a very exquisite little prince snow globe! and a brooch for mummy. oh we had cantonese roast for dinner! the suckling pig was excellent! dumbdumb weiyang didn't like it, and kept giving it to me =) i went to bc mall again in the night and bought perfumes.

on day five we had a lot to eat for brunch, because seibu ordered too much dim sum. but it was quite nice. and it was really cheap; each person paid like S$5 only. we visited the hong kong heritage, history, science and art museums. omg we saw mr chia at the art museum! there was that hair exhibition, like the one at esplanade's concourse when it first opened. day five was wednesday, so every museum we went to had free admission haha. the 'energy-saving machine' in the science museum was quite cool!

we took the tram to the peak, and it was curious how the buildings all fit nicely onto the steep slopes. they all seemed precariously perched on the hills. oh the tram ride was really cool. it was so steep that my ear kept blocking up because of the rapid pressure change.

the view from the peak was stunning! and it was really freezing haha. we exchanged our christmas presents, and then i got a big bear from siuchu. and we did alfresco dining for dinner at the peak. omg it was like how cold! oh we got lucky when we reached the bottom of the peak. haha we caught an open-top bus, and so it was my first time travelling open-air on a bus! went to bank centre mall again, but the shoe shop didn't have the size i wanted for a shoe =(

i watched a french film in the hotel, and then i dreamt that mummy became quite old with white hair =(

ocean park on day six. omg we spent like the whole day there. the first ride that seibu took us to take was the wet one grr. my jeans got like super wet =( then we went to the washing machine ride that never got me dry. and then we queued for the smaller roller coaster ride. omg it was so scary i decided not to take the big one. weiyang too! haha then we took the viking ship and jiayun kept screaming haha. finally we went to take the family-friendly ferris wheel yay.

the food there smelled so good i just had to buy it. omg fried chicken! we watched the dolphin and seal show! ahh the dolphins were so nice. i want to be a dolphin next time! and we went to see the jellyfish exhibition. so cool! i rushed back to the hotel to rebond my hair and it was cheap, like S$60 only! yes, i think the rebond was my best buy. then i went to bank centre mall (again) and bought another pair of shoes.

weiyang's friend yuk lun came to bring us round on day seven. we walked down fa yuen street which was lined with many shoe shops. i bought a pair of le coq sportif for my sister. then we took note of some potential buys, and then went to meet the rest. then we went to ap liu street, which had lots of electronics stuff. there were so many handphone shops, but none of them sold handphone pouches =(

seibu brought us to a mall that was so packed with people i never got past the first floor. but i got six dvds there for about S$48 only! and then she brought us to another mall to look at her cousin, who looked a lot like chenkai.

we went back to mongkok to buy shoes at fa yuen street. i bought a pair of acupuncture shoes! ahh they were so expensive but so nice! i went to bank centre mall yet again to try to get the pair of shoes for which the shopkeeper never had the size i wanted. i was running in the cold without a jacket and in sandals! but i watched as the shopkeeper closed the store =(

the last day was for miscellaneous shopping. haha shopping for those people i never could find anything for. and yes i finally found a watch for daddy. and i bought many hokkaido chocolates to bring back to singapore! the bus that was supposed to fetch us to the airport came so late that when we checked in there were no more window seats =(

ok, so hong kong was fun. and smoky. and there were christmas carols everywhere. if you can translate 'strawberry' from english to cantonese, then you shouldn't have problems translating 'spaghetti' and 'starbucks' too! on the plane back, beejuan and weiyang were behaving like white trash. i watched the devil wears prada on beejuan's ipod yay.

why is there always a sad feeling after coming back from a trip? even the sky is crying. does a windbreaker break wind?

pixie dance

i've just been so rude and irritable these few days. don't know why. and then i felt like bitch-slapping the guy at my block who took the lift from level 1 to 2. then again, i'm always tempted to take the lift from level 1 to 1M in school.

香港, here i come! diao.

muack* 1

kisses are such simple things we hardly notice them. the act itself never varies, but each kiss carries with it a meaning all it's own. it can convey a husband's eternal devotion, or a wife's enormous regret. it can symbolize a mother's growing concern, or a lover's growing passion. but whatever it's meaning, each kiss reflects a basic human need - the need to connect to another human being. this desire is so strong it's always amazing when some people don't understand it.

mary alice

nope

it's been a really gloomy day. i swept the floor today. yay today's a thursday with no syo rehearsal. for some reason i missed joel again yesterday. oh, teri hatcher wrote a book called burnt toast: and other philosophies of life!

urgh

i should just sell my viola and get some money. then earn minimum wage for the rest of my life. uneventful day again. i spent a few hours clearing junk out of my computer and defragmenting the hard disk. and playing neopets. do you think kacheek seek will ever make it to the 'featured game'?

i just don't know now. and everyone makes me doubt my choices. i have an urge to eat tiramisu.

dreamworks

last night, i recalled that two nights ago i dreamt of jumping down a building. not just once, but many times, as though it were a drill practice or something. i was supposed to spray water down below first before attempting each jump. so cool, maybe i've been watching too much of the doha asian games.

last night i dreamt that i was baking cookies again. somehow the first cookie looked like a strudel. and yiyan was there messing up everything. he preheated my oven when everything was still inside the oven. so, my plastic wares melted. and for some reason i was using paper baking trays, if they actually existed.

grovel

i was at the old house, alone. just sitting in front of the spoilt piano trying to make some tunes. i could hear the fan downstairs spinning; i could feel it spinning under my feet. such is the thinness of the ceilings/floors of old flats. i grew up in this old house listening to the fans downstairs many times.

the clock was ticking away. i could hear it. and all the time, the house was just getting darker and darker. in a world filled with darkness, we all need some kind of light. whether it's a great flame that shows us how to win back what we've lost, or a powerful beacon intended to scare away potential monsters, or a few glowing bulbs that reveal to us the hidden truth of our past. we all need something to help us get through the night, even if it's just the tiniest glimmer of hope.

there were only mosquitoes around to accompany me in the old house. just like nature boy. my handphone has been silent these few days. but surprise! i received an sms today. but doh >.< it was just amanda asking about physics. these few days, i've been going online three hours ahead of when i usually do. so, i end up going online the whole day.

the truth is, i'm not happy. oh, i did a quick search and found that i haven't used 'unhappy' before on the blog. i've been using 'not happy'. scratch that, i'm unhappy. so, if i grovelled, would you be nice again?

here's a game! it's called 'guess the names'. there are five names listed below for you to guess. the names are as they are in their owners' ez link cards or something.

1. ----- ----
2. ---- ------
3. ----- --- ---
4. -- --------
5. --- ---- ---- ----

bless you if the letters in your name happen to match the blanks. the topic is 'if i had a gun, who would i shoot?' (and, i would shoot them in the order listed.)

syncopate

pain is good. i love pain.

i need to pack for hong kong soon. but you'll come back only after i go. and then maybe i'll never be able to come back omg! *gasp* maybe i'll be kidnapped in hong kong for my passport and i'll never return! then i'll be sold to russia to work there as a beggar forever! *gasp* oh please stop ignoring me.

.

first i dreamt that someone died of a heart attack. next, we were both turning back time to change the course of history. when he had the heart attack the second time, i immediately called an ambulance. and he said that he felt lucky and wouldn't die. and he didn't. yay!

then i was in a dream dancing an indian dance with some people.

teletubby

i had quite a cool dream last night. we (a group of nondescript people) were standing on the roof of some building in orchard. and then i spotted a dust cloud that started swirling around a tree. it got so fast, and the whole disc of dust swooped up into the sky. i suppose if it was in america it would have formed a tornado.

from afar, fiery red-black clouds were moving in fast. and they covered up the sky over orchard quite quickly. i thought it was weird that the dark clouds should have red in them. then, fireballs started to emerge and plunge down, and i realised it was a cloud of ash and bombs from a volcano far away! suddenly, we were all on ground level, running for shelter. i was running towards wisma atria (think food republic) and i remember stopping to let a bomb drop in front of me.

---

i've been listening to chopin's cello sonata. and i've been thinking all things bad about msn messenger. it makes people become rude, intentionally or otherwise; the way 'ok's just put an end to conversations. it makes people enemies when wrong words are chosen. the emoticons don't exactly look like the emotions they're supposed to express; when you choose one that looks like what you want to express, the shortcut that calls out the emoticon misleads the other person. after some time of ignoring someone on msn messenger, you just want to talk to the person again. and when you finally find enough courage to do so, you'll find that he/she has just went offline. or better yet, blocked you forever.

let's ignore each other until one us of dies. what say you? in quite the same ways, we are all like the little boy who plants a light bulb and prays that come spring a chandelier will bloom.

savoir faire

it's been a gloomy but beautiful day. i'm happy and that's what i want. i had burger king for dinner. when i looked into my paper bag and saw my onion rings, i remembered someone who ate onion rings using a straw because he hadn't washed his hands.

someday in the future, we can look each other in the eye and say 'hi'.

hypo-

amazingly, my sleep cycle has not been disrupted at all. but this means that i'm piggy enough to sleep a total of 6+8 hours in less than 24 hours. can you imagine someone sleeping 13+12 hours in less than 24 hours?

distance is the feeling when you can't talk to someone who is online. especially someone you haven't talked to for almost two months (sixty days to be exact). fucked up, isn't it? go to hell, bitch! heaven's not for you, nor me.

i can't play tzigane and i wish i was a much better player. jeer at me, no one's stopping you. keep doing that, and i'll shoot you one day when i have a gun.

look, i really need some time to learn vectors well enough to do the tutorial. maybe next year's mathematics topics are going to be much harder. not to mention that i've already pretty much forgotten how to do binomial expansion. oh dear!

please tell me what's wrong. quite contrary to popular belief, i'm not so cold like you. rest assured, your secrets will be safe (until i divulge them to the whole world). so, be nice to me and i'll keep your secrets. try buying me some godiva chocolates, or a grand concert harp. understood?

vole meat sounds disgusting. would you like to try them if you had the chance?

xylophones sound better than glockenspiels. yoyo sounds the same when you reverse the syllables. zap back to reality, now!

---

wow that took me two hours. of course, they don't really make much sense, because they're simply sentences which begin with subsequent letters of the alphabet. guess what? there are 26 sentences above the dashes!

interstice

i made up for everything by sleeping from 1 to 7.30.

maul

yesterday was a gloomy day. i spent some time in the morning playing poker mahjong with mummy. it was the stayover at beejuan's house. we went bowling first at safra. we played at the arcade, and it was fun. dinner was at tiong bahru market. i had lee hong kee's rice. and yiyan bought the fried oysters. so fattening!

we took a scary climb/run up mount faber at like 11:30pm. and then we were stuck on it for a while, looking for the route to habourfront. and then there was this nice couple who offered us a ride in their van down the hill. it was a bit scary, like we were being kidnapped =(

nothing was open at vivocity anymore, and we started walking all the way back to beejuan's house. i bought a chocolate milk on the way, and then it made me high. and i was walking on the empty road. no car knocked me down.

we tried watching an american haunting, but the dvd couldn't work. so we ended up watching kill bill, and it was so weird, i didn't know if it should be considered a comedy or serious movie. by the time kill bill ended, the sun was already on its way up.

a sleazy morning.

slut

i'm 36% slutty. i think the woman looks like teri hatcher.

dating types

The Slow Dancer Deliberate Gentle Love Dreamer (DGLDm) Steady, reliable, and cradling him tenderly. Take a deep breath, and let it out real easy...you are The Slow Dancer. Your focus is love, not sex, and for your age, you have average experience. But you're a great, thoughtful guy, and your love life improves every year. There's also a powerful elimination process working in your favor: most Playboy types get stuck raising unwanted kids before you even begin settling down. The men left over will be hot and yours. Your ideal man is someone intimate, intelligent, and very supportive. While you're not exactly the life of the party, you do thrive in small groups of smart people. Your circle of friends is extra tight and it's HIGHLY likely they're just like you. You appreciate symmetry in relationships. Your exact opposite: The Hornivore Random Brutal Sex Master ALWAYS AVOID: The False Messiah CONSIDER: The Gentleman or The Slow Dancer Link: The 32-Type Dating Test by OkCupid - Free Online Dating.

psychoanalyst

last night i remember being all excited about falling asleep so that i could see what new dream i would have, seeing that i've been having weird dreams these few nights. of course, i hoped it wouldn't be the dying one again. and i hoped that when i woke up, i would be able to remember what the dream was. and so, i dreamt of an essay competition last night. i had to write in two entries, and i didn't have paper and pen.

i'm sure freud has an explanation for all this.

spelling

i had the weirdest dream-in-a-dream dream. i almost died in this one, but i miraculously survived ha! last night i really missed you, and i'm not happy. got to do more housework. i bought five beardpapa cream puffs, and i intend to eat all of them today. bought some of my next year's school supplies. can't wait to go back bleagh.

i can't believe that america will not broadcast anymore desperate housewives until next year! if your name were a word, what would it mean?

today your wish is my command, but only today. oh oops i forgot, it's already tomorrow for you.

actually, but, so, sigh.

last night, i dreamt of hitting you endlessly and crying. i woke up early to pass lizheng the mugger my physics and chemistry files. took a bus down to the market to have breakfast with beejuan and jia en. oh i had a complete soya bean breakfast.

omg we walked from my house to raffles city. we walked past the shophouses along cantonment street and neil road, and they all look so nice. on the way we saw some bad translations for some road names. and there's a lot of dust in the city area. i was in slippers, and all the dust just clinged on my feet. my slippers were drenched in dirt and sweat =( and my feet were beginning to look like frodo's.

lunch was at soup spoon. i had the clam chowder, and i bit on a leaf thinking it was mushroom. but hey, jia en had clam chowder a few times thinking that it was chicken inside. we were shopping for the $20 gifts. and i got like two blisters on one toe because of the slippers =( beardpapa's cream puff is so scarily fattening, but it's nice.

it's been a beautiful day. but the sad fact is, we all have secrets. honey, you wouldn't understand even if you were me. 'cliques' and 'blister' are derived from the same key-presses on the handphone.

design

omg i watched flags of our fathers and casino royale back-to-back, and i'm super tired now. i had ben and jerry's ice cream after that. it's been a beautiful day, and i miss you. clara had this display picture on msn that read 'don't worry about the world coming to an end today. it's already tomorrow in australia.'

the moon tonight is round but glaring. i like playing hasee bounce on neopets. O=('.'Q) is a punch, but shanghui doesn't think it looks like a punch. he said that o.O is pop-out eye. RGB values (247,130,230) gives a baby pink, while (000,128,255) gives a baby blue.

phoenix

do you know that i have a compulsion to eat or do housework when i think of you? and day by day, as i clean my room, i'm watching the flower that yiyan picked wilt. it's drooping more and more; i think it's dying. and there's nothing i can do to save it.

i'm listening to 我真的受伤了 by 张学友.

it's not always easy to tell the good people from the bad people. sinners can surprise you, and the same can be said of saints. why do we try so hard to define people as simply good or bad? because we refuse to believe that compassion and cruelty can lie side by side in the same heart. because we fear the fact that anyone is capable of anything.

then in this world of darkness, we all need some colour.

existentials

This Is My Life, Rated
Life:	5.1
Mind:	6.1
Body:	7.3
Spirit:	4.6
Friends/Family:	4
Love:	0.8
Finance:	4.8
Take the Rate My Life Quiz

adriel makes me feel like i have a sad life.

baguette

is product differentiation a mathematics term or economics term? i don't get vectors at all. i can't remember the formula for length of projection, and the tutorial is so difficult. i think vectors is going to make me lose my A for maths.

they say money can't buy happiness, but that's just a lie told by rich people to keep poor people from rioting. i found a secret petpet laboratory map when i signed in to neopets today.

it's been a beautiful day today. and oh dear i forgot that shirong flew off yesterday. i thought she was flying off tomorrow =(

blessed

i woke up at 12 noon. i was trying to get freebies out of the money tree at neopets. after countless tries, i picked up 100NP from the ground, not from the money tree. this sucks; i had lots of housework to do today.

i was reminded of the persistence of memory today, when i walked past an old shop at kim tian road. the shop's previous sign boards have been removed to reveal the earliest one, which was mosaic-tiled onto the wall. the shop was 'asia eating house', and i think that was even before i was born.

because where there are shadows, there must be light. twin regency looks like it's going to be complete soon, and that means raywen's moving soon too!

debouch

i've convinced myself that what i'm doing is what i want. mr shagimardanov was practising his flute upstairs, so i climbed up the stairs and gave him the box of cookies. i don't know why, but i felt like i just had to, or i would feel guilty forever. to soothe our consciences with small acts of kindness.

i let many people try my cookies. wouldn't say that they were inedible, so i guess they're ok. in fact, the only thing i couldn't get right was the texture. but i didn't manage to give you one of my cookies. i wanted so much to have you try it, but i didn't dare to ask you still. anyway, they're not really that kickass (yet).

i almost cried at dance of the blessed spirits. mr shagimardanov's playing just feels so much like danil's. i still don't understand why i could have hated someone and not stopped until he died. and it feels terrible.

i received an ugly flower today, which i think yiyan picked. but never mind, a flower's still a flower. and you wouldn't be able to understand or appreciate it. there were no viola photos this time. nobody had time for a viola photo this time. i loved the viola power!

i went to ben and jerry's at raffles city with yiyan, beejuan, weiyang and jia en. yiyan and weiyang bought apple crumbles, which were absolutely not nice to eat. the ones in school are much better, seriously. i saw leening and joel (who is somewhat like joel ong) at the city hall mrt later.

i began to miss you a few moments later. and then impact of everything i have done since 9th october 2006 came upon me. i need time to forget all these things that i've done, and then i can finally go to bed without fear of having bad dreams in which i die and tell you my final wishes.

i just need some distractions. when i got home, i did the dishes. and then tomorrow i'm going to iron clothes, sweep and mop the floor, and wash more dirty clothes. everyone has a little dirty laundry.

weicheng told me that not everyone i like must like me back. and yes, i should hate less people. it's finally december; advent calendar is on at neopets now.

confirm

i woke up before 7 and couldn't fall asleep again. so, i just got up and started baking cookies for mr shagimardanov. i managed to crack an egg properly this time. and the cookies look so pretty! ok, i didn't make them from scratch the way bree does (i used betty crocker), but it was my first time baking alone. as lynette says, she doesn't bake; this is big. i was done baking by 9.