先苦后甜

today we had early dismissal for many lessons. civics, geography and gp (whoa like surprise of the century. like, yah.) i had a crispy donut that was interestingly flat on one side. oh i think the chemistry test was fun. and then i just remembered how long we haven't had a maths test. school needs something for me to look forward to.

lunch was at cafe cartel with yishi, clara, weiyang, seibu, yiyan and jia en. omg i'm so happy with the 30% discount. new day new discovery: curry mayo was quite nice - i was eating bread after bread. oh and i had bread pudding which was so warm and nice!

today i sat with shanghui under block B because i had nothing to do. he made me feel so unconfident in getting to UK next year. oh, and he smelled of grass and sweat after running for interhouse track =S 先苦后甜 - do national service first, then study. (that's what he says.) but i just want to fly off and go everywhere and become part of the earth, because we all came from the earth and thus we must be returned to the earth (by conservation of mass).

joel is online now but away. i think it's 7am over there now. maybe he's not awake; then he's wasting electricity leaving the computer on. well, toffa sent an email that teaches us to save electricity! choose blackle.com over google.com as energy consumption is reduced with the black background of blackle.com as opposed to white background of google.com!

that's an interesting view.
- kyoya ootori

but i don't understaand.

changing passwords

a long time ago mummy used to go the community centre for baking classes, and i would be outside playing by myself. i remember there were lots of worms along the walls of the community centre.

i watched harry potter today. like, finally. i think luna lovegood is so lofty, but the girl doesn't really suit the role. at a cd shop, i heard twins' 多谢失恋 playing overhead. oh yes i mailed my first ever letter to america (to joel).

is mulan supposed to encourage us to join the army?

ootoro

i made my cello debut outside ngee ann city today. omg it was so dumb and noisy that no one could hear us anyway. but thanks to amanda, i got some freebies today, and we went to pop doh and got some discount on donuts. (i think the best part of the busking was playing the birthday song for someone's birthday.)

joel was online last night but not this morning.

some jokes i read from a book at a bookshop today: women wear white at the wedding to blend in with the kitchen appliances. the caesarean section is a district in rome. children suck the mother when they are young but the father when they are old.

expect the worst, hope for the best

this morning i really forgot about my tie. realised only when i was at outram, but didn't get off until i was at tanjong pagar. and so i went back home to get the tie, and took a taxi to school. there were four birds under block B and they were phenomenally noisy.

sat in the canteen for a while with clara. we all knew the purpose of going to school today. it's for the free food. yes, and so apart from getting the $40 prize, there was the food! there was rice, fried crabstick which was very well-disguised, fishies, prawns, tofu, tarts and jelly. omg free lunches are great!

today i realised that mr sze has a funnier, friendlier side.

went with seibu back to the old house to get the cello. i think we've got some haze today, but the afternoon rain brought it down. got weiyang to come to my house too, but i think we all didn't do much work. i registered for the UCAS application today. (really hope i can get a full scholarship and stay in the UK for some time for free.)

i bought durians for the first time today. and it was truly difficult to buy durians. and aunties standing around the stall all carried umbrellas in the same way.

ha i managed to scare weiyang by putting a bear over him when he fell asleep on the sofa. he shouted when he woke up yay. dinner was at the shanghai restaurant. haven't been there in such a long time already.

the sky wasn't clear yet in the evening. but i believed that if the sky cleared then the moon tonight would be very pretty. and so the sky did; and so the moon was. were you looking at it too? i remembered once we were walking under a perfect moon and eating chocolate that melted gently between our fingers. it was my best memory. i can't forget you; i do love you.

reflection (mulan)

look at me,
i will never pass for a perfect bride,
or a perfect daughter.
can it be i'm not meant to play this part?
now i see that if i were truly to be myself,
i would break my family's heart.

who is that girl i see
staring straight back at me?
why is my reflection someone i don't know?
somehow i cannot hide who i am
though i've tried
when will my reflection show
who i am inside?

when will my reflection show
who i am inside?

omg after so many years this song is still so nice, like once upon a december.

罗密欧:茱麗葉

chemistry practical was so colourful today. there was white, dark green, greyish green, pale pink, off-white, pale green, dirty green, brown, yellowish brown, reddish brown, blue, pale blue, deep blue, and blood-red! yihui and i were busy taking photos of all the colours. omg i think that the precipitate formed by shooting sodium hydroxide into copper(II) sulphate is so cute!

tried to jog with sonya and clara today, but then the rain came on our third round. went back to the gym where i was so amazed by some new gadgets.

i'm listening to eason chan, and it reminds me of playing in the concert in january this year.

have we finally managed to reach the point where i can walk right past you without wanting to stop, turn, look at your back, and have the urge to run to you and hug you? i'm not quite sure i've seen that shade of green.

nippon

last night i was playing jigsaw too on msn with weiyang. omg so fun! i haven't played with puzzles in such a long time.

it's been a day of discoveries, from the phosphoric(III) acid thing to the periodic acid. but it's also been a gloomy day. the clouds outside the window were really ominous during maths tutorial. and when it started to pour, i was reminded of how i once stood under a shelter and looked out into the rain while waiting for someone.

there were j1s playing funny things on the piano in LT3.

chin chow

it's truly cold these few days. and it seems, the colder it is, the lower the air-con temperature gets. today i wore clara's football jacket, mr lee's national geographic sweater, and sonya's green jacket. then it began to rain all over again. when i finally met shanghui in the canteen he said he was going to shit >.< did much work in the library; the revision exercise on differential equations is so much harder than my h3 work =(

another wintersun. when i think about how you looked at me angrily yesterday, i start getting stabbing pains inside.

füt

it's been a bitterly cold day. it's the calm before the storm, like weiyang's stomach. sometimes we ask whether we are all made of water. is it really possible to stop loving altogether so quickly? when will the punishment stop?

i would love to rest too, but i can't because people keep calling me to ask maths and physics. i'm changing my handphone wallpaper today, but messenger is not letting me change my display picture.

this part makes me cry

乌烟障气

it's been a gloomy day today, so we must all be brave like haru-chan. gloomy day topped with essay assignments. it's also joel's birthday today, although he's twelve hours behind me. i also crossed paths with the joel-look-alike. i discovered that kyoya-senpai's birthday is the same as mine, and the time now is 11:22pm.
we know that everything will be fine as long as there's no true emotion involved.

sakura

a storm is imminent now.
maybe tomorrow i'll see this. (it is a double rainbow, if you can see the reflected one.)

progression

it's been a gloomy morning. this morning i didn't even remember why my mother woke me up at 7am. (actually, i told her to do so.) i think we're all just too tired nowadays. went for the teaching scholarships tea session, and they had creamy tea-time stuffz.

these are photos taken on the same evening, within a span of eight minutes.

somebody please tell me if harry died. i'll wait two years before i buy the last book at $10.

家家酒

today i had the last embarrassing pe lesson. it was truly embarrassing beyond embarrassing. lunch was at pastamania and it was so fun because i got six stamps at one go thanks to yihui, clara, beejuan, yiyan and jia en. so we shared a mango pizza.

went back to school for the UK universities talk. while waiting, we went to the library to mug. i spent like two hours completing only three questions in the integration revision worksheet.

got cheated for the talk because it was only on medicine. dinner was at j8 again. yishi, beejuan and i went for toriQ and there was this group of scary guys that the shopkeeper shooed away to let us sit.

monologue: you don't have any homework this week?

the last episode of ouran is so touching that i just cried and cried watching it. i stood by the window and watched as the sky got darker and darker. it's just the electron coming out.

install and unstall

this morning there were some really spectacular cloud formations overlooking the parade square. then the dark clouds rolled in and it really rained. and it did rain for the whole day. i had some piano time with dawn and suhui in the LT just before h3. so fun!

had dinner with seibu at mos burger and it was so expensive. then i went to buy durian puffs and now we know seibu hates durian. met amanda and we went to buy cheapo biscuits! omg so fun, and then i went to buy a flower. fell completely in love with the perfect rose. it's like so perfect! we also saw this interesting vegetable-looking flower called 'cabbage rose'.

i love kodály's intermezzo from the háry jános suite! and mr lim does too! ok, maybe the yellow river concerto wasn't too cheena after all.

it's a smiling moon tonight.

nose digging

yesterday i didn't have dinner and this morning the acid in my stomach was like some bomb. it was like some acidic flux inside. watched video again for ms law's lesson. i wish i never had to remember anymore things for hydrology or urban geography anymore =( the pail and gloves and rag and dettol in my classroom are gone too.

it rained for a long while in the late afternoon. oh shanghui had swollen eyes today. stayed back in school to catch up on all the work that i had given up for the past week in place of ouran and yishi's chinese book. oh xiangjun and alex and davidson were a few classrooms away. haha xiangjun told me alex broke a bottle, and that he always breaks something. omg euler's method, unimproved or improved, is so tiring to do. i was so knocked out from seeing digits after digits.

walked to the chamber room, and voila they were doing library cataloging! the rise library was also opened and i saw the 2003 syf photo. showed it to ms ku. omg that photo is like ancient, but it still brings back so many memories. there, in the photo, is me sitting between shanghui and joel, all the time looking at mr sze, because mr sze says 'watch the conductor.' and then yes, when you move your eyes around, you see that everyone is watching him. haha shanghui did have a goggled-eye face!

on the 19th july page in my notebook, there is a very special imprint. honey-kun is so cute! but how does he take so much sweets? i got so tired chewing and chewing on a chocolate tart =(

balls of chocolate

oh mr lee's birthday is today! i think my geography teachers are so funny. ms law brings her own lunchbox to 打包 food. sonya brought chocolate balls today, and i think i ate a hell lot, so i skipped dinner. after h3, i was watching a little yellow bird pollinating an ixora. it's not possible to be friends now, so i'll hope for a better future.

borodin was a composer and a chemist too. parallel fifths are so straightforward and they'll never meet.

this time i didn't watch the retreating back. i ran up.

thirds and sixths

this blog is now two years old. did some teacher try to celebrate it for me by wearing some maternity dress today? honestly. 'no extra marks given.'

it has been a very hot day. after school i was sitting with shanghui to ask him everything on the integration revision exercise, but it was only for a short while because he got whisked away. then auntie ruolin came down, but so sad she missed him already. trudged in the sun with auntie all the way to mrt, and revised chemistry on the train.

don't like sun =( went home and slept till 6pm. given my impeccable filing skills/system, i'm shocked to announce that i spent at leats ten minutes trying to find my urban geography tys. something must be wrong.

it's really distressing when you know it's supposed to be there but you don't see it, then you start turning everything upside down, only to find that it was lying in the original place all along.
after shredding the paper, i managed to piece it all back together. i do think that my sister is playing three guys at one shot. and that's quite powerful.

haunted staircases

let me tell you about this place. it is the corner shop at the two-storey block along kim tian road, on the side nearer to tiong bahru road.

my first memory of this shop was that it was the angie cake shop, and very long ago every saturday/sunday i would buy the bar-like cake from the shop.

then it became four leaves, at a time when the logo for four leaves was still pointed leaves, and not the circular ones as it is now. we would always buy the fruit cake from four leaves for every occasion thinkable.

both of these cake shops moved to tiong bahru plaza in the end, and four leaves went on to become even more high-class.

back to this shop - it's a sichuan/shanghai eatery now. i can no longer remember clearly what happened between four leaves and this eatery. i think somewhere along the line it became a shoe shop that i never visited. but anyway, the shop just kept changing from owner to owner.

right now, it's an eatery that no one visits. and this photo isn't the signboard of the eatery. it's actually the very first and original signboard of the very first owner of the shop i guess. that's even before angie, before my earliest memory of the place. the renovation of this eatery wasn't complete, and so i happened to see this signboard and capture a glimpse of the beginnings of this shop space.

no one patronises this eatery because two shops down the block it's a cheaper economic rice eatery; three shops down it's 7-eleven; five shops down it's another economic rice eatery; about 400m down tiong bahru road it's the market's hawker centre; and another 10m away from the market it's a nicer-looking shanghai eatery.

oh and just around the corner of this shop is a very dark place with trees and an altar deep inside that glows red at night. and there're always some black cats lurking around.

kiss kiss fall in love

kreutzer studies are killing me. it's such a sunny day today. i wanted to go to ben and jerry's, but decided to save money instead. i would also like to watch harry potter. i think i'll go soon.
there's just a very faint smell on my violin case.

peek

triskaidekaphobia

today is friday the thirteenth, and pe was so scary and embarrassing. lunch was much better, because weiyang brought us there to enjoy the 30% discount. omg yishi, seibu, weiyang and i shared macaroni, fish and chips, fish and shrimp, and some bomb ribs. so fun and so value for money!

trudged back to school to join yishi and weiyang at mr tham's chemistry lesson. yay so fun, revised some electrochemistry. i also tried to do the integration revision exercise again, and this time i could get more right answers.

junqi will come out soon.

(in a lofty tone) i understand and i forgive. (voice-over, as in mean girls) but i won't forget.

if we could be together in our next life, then i'll wait. i'll wait for you in my next life. you will not see or hear from me again.

junqi

it began raining in the morning at the same time as it did yesterday. physics practical was quite fun. i liked the alpha particle game. it was still gloomy after school. oh yes clara had koala biscuits that were gluten-free, wheat-free, free of everything, and quite taste-free too.

what if he liked you?
then i will not talk to him. and if i see him, i will avoid his eyes.

回到原点? the evening sky was a blazing orange.

whisper

it rained heavily today.

ms law's lesson was fun because we got to look at all the interesting stuff she bought. there was the bomb (which looked like poop), ventifact, aa flow (which was so spiky), and tillite (which i didn't get to touch). there was also a stalactite that wasn't made of calcite, but halite, which clara says is just table salt. touching the bomb and aa flow was like touching the centre of the earth.

this afternoon was chamber's farewell. they played taboo and some lame questions thing. so, the question of the day is: which chamber girl would shanghui like to go to a nudist beach with? we each got a nice rest note, and a pretty picture frame with the syf photo.

i went for waffles with amanda.

sometimes, we wonder how nice it would be if love was never tainted by the expectations of the people around us; how nice it would be if people never teased the would-be couple, and just let them slowly discover their love for each other; how nice it would be if love was simply a series of chemical reactions that could be undone easily.

and at this point in time no one puts it better than rhysenn:
1 - heaven's poisoned wine; unnatural love, and more unnatural hate
2 - love is a many splintered thing
3 - love lives in sealed bottles of regret
4 - the opposite of love is not hate; it’s indifference
5 - you're incomplete until you're in love; then you're finished
6 - and love's the noblest frailty of the mind
7 - but love can hope where reason would despair
8 - love means never having to say you're sorry
9 - the magic of love is the ignorance that it can ever end
10 - who so loves, believes the impossible
11 - love is not a word; it's a sentence

love.

i knew someone who couldn't pronounce 'quote' properly. but we tried our best together.

itch b!tch

it was a gloomy morning and so assembly was cancelled. oh my clara has so many new soft toys. we finally got back our geography papers. turns out, my physical geography was better than human, as usual. my gp essay wasn't as well done as expected.

h3 was moved to the mother-far LT6 because there was a clash with the j1 h3 physics. i think slope fields are cute.

i've been watching the dvořák video again and again. you didn't want to see nor hear from me, so i'm sorry that we ran into each other today. but it was a beautiful day, wasn't it?

there was an absolute coldness in the eyes, so cold that it actually scares you.

ten-year series

this morning there was a train fault and i was so much later for school. there isn't much meaning to going to school nowadays. there used to be a time when i was so eager for the end of school, so that i could run to find you.

but who knows? when you're out of love, you get free food.

失戀最幸福 人人陪在我旁
輪班去照料我 怕我沒法起床

got back maths paper. had some stupid mistakes =( on the way out of school i saw a mediacorp van drive past. adrian pang was inside. why do we still shun away? because we know things cannot be the same anymore.

losing it

so i guess we can't be friends anymore. it's ok, i'll try my best to move on. it's just, i don't believe what you said; you couldn't have meant it. postsecret finally updated. i don't have later, you stupid bitch.

it rained in the night. some lightning god up there kept flashing, while some thunder god kept clapping. maybe some other world exists up there, where the gods come in conjugate pairs.

cents and sensibility

this morning i woke up at 11:30. it was cold because apparently it had been raining last night. mummy was already multi-tasking in the kitchen. i also woke up to a very acidic sms.

if you planted a light bulb, you could get a chandelier; if you planted a waterbottle, you could get a fountain.

i seriously don't care if the thing flying over me is an apache or chinook or whatever-it's-spelt.

honestly, i don't think the 'live earth' concerts have much use. why should it take celebrities to finally, finally, get people to know about global warming. don't television advertisements and documentaries do the same? i think this is just another gimmick for profit-driven media companies to make more money. do you honestly believe that humans, after watching some stars singing, will start becoming more environmentally-friendly than before? on top of that, isn't it ironical that to raise awareness on global warming, companies are organising concerts to consume even more energy in terms of lighting and air-conditioning and everything? it's like getting people all over the world to congregate and generate heat together.

best of all, bless the people who even go to buy a green t-shirt to support the event.

不太知道

this morning a friendly mother came to me and asked me how i managed to get to school on time taking the same train as her, because she thought i was from ri. i crossed ms koo's path while crossing the road, but she was concentrating so hard on driving that i don't think she noticed me.

did a little qualitative analysis during chemistry practical. there was no pe because of the fire drill. went out with yihui, yishi, beejuan and jia en to mcdonald's for ice cream because it was such a hot day, then i went back to school.

sometimes i think the only thing i'm best at is waiting. i was reading yishi's chinese book, throwing and catching pebbles the way jeffrey taught me, listening to bagpipes from the boys' brigade, watching car after car go by, making the ixoras bloom, watching as the shadows grew longer and longer until there were no more shadows because everything was already in the shadows, and stupidly but truly believing that you would turn up.

it was quite cold sitting in the night wind. i heard a stray violin sound coming from the boarding blocks. and there were stars tonight. no, i will not stop loving so easily because i'm not like my sister.

因为爱你,失去了自尊。因为爱你,任由你欺负。因为爱你,随你来践踏。

world bad

it was a cool morning, turned gloomy, then sunny.

we tried the indian stall for recess. omg so expensive =( shan't buy from there anymore. oh shanghui's got into top 20 for chemistry test again, and with three stars beside his name! oh but i think i could get one more mark for my paper. question 2 of paper 3 was so badly done; i'm horrified at the ridiculously ridiculous mistakes i made.

physics practical was so phantastically colourful and fun. then ms koo said no one in class got above 90 for the maths test =( h3 maths got cut short by a bit because of physics olympiad.

for a fleeting moment i thought i could see you, but i didn't.

tournament

mr tham announced the chemistry common test results today. i was telling shanghui about my results but it felt like trying to illict a response from a dummy; he just kept nodding and saying 'ok'. why? because he scored 108/120 'only'.

i sat in the art room for a while after school to look at the artworks.

in secondary school we read 朱自清's 《背影》. today i watched someone's back too. love is blind, so it'll never find you, nor me.

khufu

this morning there were lots of chocolates from clara from america, and krispy kreme donuts from james from indonesia. there was also civics breakfast. i didn't have to eat for recess and lunch anymore. but then i've been eating these bits and pieces of junk food today; it's killing me!

gp was terrible. as usual, we're doing essay outlines! there, i devoted one paragraph to gp.

omg i'm so tired of chemistry lectures now. everything is about effective nuclear charge, effective nuclear charge and effective nuclear charge. pe was quite fun but so tiring. i tried doing pull-ups and i could still do four! h3 is on differential equations now. the are-you-troubled teacher is lecturing. omg she's so nice and funny.

shanghui was behind me on the way out of school. and then i bumped into tianyi at j8.

i looked up at the corridor and saw no dancers today. 'exoskeleton' is an oxymoron.

poopie

last night i dreamt of burying the oxides and chlorides of group III elements and they woke up as inferi. last night i was waiting for postsecret to update, but it never did. it still isn't this morning/afternoon.

i feel like making tiramisu. this time i'll use mascarpone and not philadelphia cheese. don't know what school will be like from now on. i really have to start trying more difficult chemistry questions. but right now i just like to listen to 流淚眼望流淚眼.

i can't wait for the end of this year.

i saw three cats sleeping at the void deck. it looked quite unnatural because they were all lying on their sides and they looked motionless. i think they were all dead.

milk run

my legs are breaking. omg stupid auntie ruolin followed nondescript people onto the wrong bus because thay all looked confident of knowing the route to zouk. and i was right - they were all blindly following the first couple up the wrong bus -.- this is the epitome of seibu-ness. i'm proud to say that we were the first to alight, and therefore everyone followed, so that no one went on further on the wrong route.

amanda was latest! and there were like so many million people. i haven't exercised in such a long time! omg i was like dying la. we didn't do all 4km, because there were many parts where people were just walking and blocking the way. but the scenery was nice! all the pretty buildings along the river. i think there was at least 2.4km of jogging, so that's not bad. in my mind, i was thinking 'what's for dinner?' most of the time.

there was no mirror but i'm quite sure my hair was very bad after the whole thing. and then we were walking out again for a while, and we stopped on the colourful bridge. it is very colourful. there's yellow, red, blue, green, cocoa, many many colours~

dinner was, unfortunately, mcdonald's (= fat). everything i lost was put back =( and i had ice cream. but never mind, so long never eat already. are we all celebrating the increment of the gst? no, that's why we were at mcdonald's (same great value. same great prices!).

i call it the 'wintersun'. cross-country - that's what jeffrey used to do right?

i shall maketh a prediction. and i had amanda and wulei as witnesses the last time. auntie ruolin will be married to you-know-who and have ten children!

temperament

i remember using straps for water bottles in primary school. it's the kind we buy from the market. i would use either a yellow or blue one last time. i think primary school children of this era don't use that anymore. they use branded bottles.

and yes, to hell with the pop-up advertisement on msn messenger.